Family Reunion

Writing this is kind of funny to me, because I know you both are going to read this. But I started this blog for me as a place to pour my thoughts in a more time-friendly way than writing them out by hand, so here goes:
Family reunions are so wonderful. Last night I finally saw Jessie and David, the first time since New Years and since I came to Yogaland. I've developed some remarkable relationships here, but nothing to compare to what I have with those two. When they look at me, I feel seen. When they listen, I know I'm being heard. So much can go unsaid because there are unspoken truths and understandings that can only develop when you go through some real transitions with someone.

The fact that they are going to be around for months is almost overwhelming. For so long I've had to be satisfied with gchat conversations from time to time and now Jessie is 15 minutes down the road. The house, a beautiful super-cottage on top of a mountain is an amazing place to have, and it is the least of my excitements. The weather is going to be shifting rapidly soon and outside will become Yogaland's playground. Lying on the dock by the lake, running through the fields, exploring the woods and being prepared at any moment to stand on my tiptoes and yell "go away bear!" Jessie and David around for so much of it.

The longer I spend here the more exposed I feel to the world. Not exposed in a bad way. Just more comfortable letting some of the shadow out into the light, seeing it for what it is. Part of it is community, and part of it is myself. I believe I'm glimpsed some of the darkness, the hidden depths of me and I am not scared to go deeper, not scared of what I might find. I have around me an incredible, almost unconscionably good support system made up of men and women of whom I think the world. They aren't going to let me fall. And at the same time they aren't going to hold me up.
They are going to be there to help when they can, console when they can't and send me love, over and over again until I believe it and feel it and know it.